Hello..........

It's been a while. Like a very long time. Like five months long time. *hides in corner*

Now, I'm not going to lie and use the "I've been really busy" excuse. I feel like everyone and their mother has used that excuse. Most of the time, they're lying. Truth is, I kinda forgot................

At first, I was busy, and then I got lazy, and then I just forgot. But I'm back! So that's what really matters. I plan on posting once a week? Maybe twice? Yeah right. 

I'm going to try to fix all of the images that won't show up. I'm really sorry about that but I will fix it. Eventually. :)

Gah, it's really raining right now. Good thing I have a delayed opening tomorrow for teacher in-service! I am so happy I can sleep for an extra two hours.

This is how I feel right now. Super tired. I want to go to bed.

Random thought: So I am in keyboarding this semester because my mom wanted me to take the class. Now, I took a keyboarding class in middle school so I can type really well. Long story short I'm using the exact same program in this class that I did in middle school, so the class is boring. REALLY boring. But, because I can already type, the class is basically a study hall that I get credit for. So, if you can type and need a study hall, think about possibly taking keyboarding. And if you can't type, take keyboarding. It's a really important skill to have.

You want to be this guy. Except don't spray on shoes unless you know how to get them off. 

Also, this is the best computer I've ever seen. 

Alright, that's it for this post cause I want to got to bed. So goodnight moon and house and desk and computer. And, of course, you. Even if you're not going to bed right now. 

From my corner of the world to yours, 

Jennifer Whyskers

Random Facts of Uselessness #10

I am really, really, really bad a consistent posts. Like I suck. I couldn't write consistently if my life depended on it.

Anyway...........

• Scientists hypothesize that for every inch a person is taller than 5 feet, they lose 1.3 years of their life. SEE THERE ARE PERKS TO BEING A LITTLE TIKE!
• In Utah, it is illegal to swear in front of a dead person. I get being respectful to the dead, but how is this enforced?
• What is called a "French kiss" in the English speaking world is called an "English kiss" in France. If it's not French, and it's not English, than what is it? Disgusting!
• Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. What? Why? Heh?
• The average talker sprays about 300 microscopic saliva droplets per minute, anout 2.5 droplets per word. That is disgusting. Really disgusting. THIS IS HOW EBOLA SPREADS PEOPLE! (jk jk)

For some reason my signature picture won't come up on my computer so if it doesn't for you, I'm really sorry. I'm trying to fix it. Just bear with me. I can't remember how to fix the code.

It's Back to School Time!

I'M SORRY IT'S BEEN LIKE FOREVER AND EVER SINCE MY LAST POST BUT I'VE JUST BEEN SO BUSY! And lazy. And busy. But mostly lazy.

You know what angers me about going back to school? I've known the classes I'm in since mid-July and I've known which teachers I have since the beginning of August. Yet, my teachers decided not to give me their supply list till the first the day of school. >:(

Speaking of school, I start this week. And I'm actually really nervous for freshman year. High school here I come!

No but seriously. I'm usually always ready to go back to school. My schedule is normally memorized 15 minutes after I get it, and I've normally mapped out all my classes by the beginning of August. By the middle of August, my locker is organized and decorated.

This year? I can't tell you what my locker is, yet alone where it is.

It's true that since I'm a freshman I have no idea where anything is and it's not fair to expect me to know where my locker is. Except I went to this thingy where a senior showed me around to all my classes and had me open my locker. I could open it, thank god, but two seconds after I left it, I forgot where it was. Good job me!

I asked some of my high school friends where my locker is. They told me I'm in one of the senior hallways. Greaaaaaaaaat. (Total sarcasm there for those who didn't realize that.) It's also nowhere near any of my classes. Which I also don't know where they are either. This year is going to be great! suck.

My first day of school is a half day because it's freshman orientation. Hopefully after that I'll have a better understanding of what the heck I'm doing. Probably not though.

Ugh. My ankle hurts from soccer practice. Soccer has been a blessing and death. It's nice cause it gets me out of bed early so I'm semi-used to getting up at 5:30 (haha no I'm not) and I know some high school kids now that I can ask where the heck I'm supposed to be. But it hurts!

I just realized I only posted once in August. Wow I really suck.

I honestly can't promise how frequently I'll be able to post throughout the school year. It will probably be when I'm procrastinating cause I don't want to do my homework. Like I'm doing now..........

Just kidding. All the homework that is due the first day of school is done. I've accomplished something in the past three months.

I've also been kind of obsessed with gifs lately, and instead of just posting them in a list, I decided to be slightly humorous. So, here is how kids handle summer work, as told through gifs.


When your teacher tells you at the end of the school year you have summer work.

But it's summer! You're not supposed to have homework over the summer!

Then they hand out the summer work, and you realize it's so much work.

How am I expected to finish all of this in two and a half months? I have to get started now.

You get home, ready to start your homework to get it done as quickly as possible.

Yes! I'm going to be done by July!

Then this happens.

You get kidnapped by the internet.

By the end of July, you still haven't touched your homework.

The internet hasn't let you out of its grasp.

Your mom asks if you've started your homework.

Um........ no?

At the start of August, part of your brain panics cause you only have a month left.

The rest of your brain tells you to chill. You have plenty of time!

All your friends want to know if you've started that math assignment because they want to compare answers.

Yeah, haven't started yet.

The week before school starts, you really begin to panic.

Crap! I forgot about my summer homework! I haven't even started!

You quickly jump on your computer to frantically write that essay required.

There are so many spelling errors, you make sure to attach a red pen on the paper for the teacher.

You wish you could this:

How else am I supposed to read a 500 page book in a week?

You then realize why your friends asked for help.

We didn't learn this! How am I expected to know how to do this? Oh God, I'm not going to finish.

Your computer begins to lag from all of your frantic typing and searches.

No, this can't be happening!

When you finish an assignment, you feel like a weight was lifted off your shoulders.

One down, 5 more to go!

You're done! You can finally take a sigh of relief.

Thank God I finished! I am never doing this again.

After staying up all night to finish your homework, you crash.

Zzzzzzzz......

You tell yourself you are never waiting to do your homework last minute again. Yeah, that never happens. 

FYI: I did exaggerate a ton with this. I did not do this. However, I do know people who waited till the week before school (AKA, now) to do their summer homework. I was smarter than that. Go me!

Happy back to school! Said no student ever.

From my corner to yours,

Jennifer Whyskers

I'm Addicted to Tic-Tacs

I have braces. Which means no sticky substances, which includes gum. I love gum. Whenever I'm in the car, I'll have a piece of gum (sugar free of course). It's just something nice to chew on to occupy my mouth. It also leaves you with nice smelling breath.

Of course then when I got my braces, it was a little difficult to give up my beloved gum. I needed to find something to replace the gum I normally chew in the car.

What is the solution to that? Tic-tacs. 

I got a large container of fruity tic-tacs for Easter, which I got addicted to. I finished the container in about a week. Whenever I sit near my container, I have to take some. It's really sad actually. My mom keeps tic-tacs in the car for me, and it's very hard to restrain myself from eating the entire container.

Weirdly, I'm not a big fan of the mint tic-tacs, so I don't eat as many of those. But the fruity ones, forget it.

I also get really protective of my tic-tacs. Once I had a party with some friends and two of them decided to help themselves to my tic-tacs. Which is fine, but they took a handful each. I yelled at them for it. They haven't taken my tic-tacs without my consent since.

The only good thing about being obsessed with tic-tacs is that the containers make great bobby pin holders. Just wrap them in some duct tape and voila! A bobby pin container. Oh, and my breath is always fruity fresh.

And mentos. I'm kinda-sorta addicted to mentos too. Not as bad as my mom though. When she needed her crown on her tooth fixed, she couldn't chew gum either. So she bought mentos. Problem is, she'd eat an entire sleeve in one sitting. I'd eat one or two, and my mom would eat the rest. Good thing she doesn't drink soda anymore. 

From my corner to yours.

Jennifer Whyskers

P.S. I'm eating orange tic-tacs as we speak. Or, as I write and you read.

Random Facts of Uselessness #9

Wow. I haven't posted in forever. Sorry folks. I just got back from my lovely vacation and now I have to go back to school shopping.

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holy crudpickles, it's really thundering currently as I'm writing this. As if I haven't gotten enough rain already. Can we please send some rain to California? They desperately need rain out there.

Where was I going with this post? Oh yes, the facts.

• The strongest human muscle in proportion to its size is the tongue. One tongue curl, two tongue curls... 100!
• The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps blood out into the body to squirt blood 30 feet. Who needs water guns when you have your heart?
• All porcupines float in water. Sorry, nothing witty to say about that. I do have a video of adorable baby hedgehogs sneezing to show you! Not exactly porcupines, but still adorable!

• Rats and horses can't vomit. Ummm, that's, uh, weird.
• Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete. I'm sure there are a whole bunch of witty things I could say about that one, but I don't have the patience right now to actually use my brain. Hehe.

By the way, the n, h, y, and u keys on my keyboard sometimes refuse to work. I'm literally left sitting there repeatedly pressing the keys like:

Function. Function. Function. Function. Function. FUNCTION!!!!! I JUST WANT AN H IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK!

Now the j key won't work. KENOFENOWSDNKFJOEANBGSOIALJHABIGKJENPODSHIFK!!!!!!

Little fyi for you. Whenever I talk in jibberish (see above ^) I'm either really excited, or really angry. Guess which one I am right now? >:(

Oh, and sometimes when I view my blog, my photos won't load. Now that's frustrating.

Wow, I have no idea what just happened. Like I started writing this with an idea in mind, and then I just let my thoughts and fingers run wild. It started out good, then it thundered. I then got it back on track just to end me ranting about my stupid keyboard and blog photos. Eh, whatever.

From my corner to yours,

Jennifer Whyskers

Why do I Have to Read a Book on Ebola? WHY????

I am so done with my summer homework.

As part of my biology summer assignment, I have to read "The Hot Zone" by Richard Preston, which is about Ebola. Let me tell you, I'm barely twenty pages into this thing and it's already scaring me. The book describes in detail someone with the Marburg virus, which is like Ebola's less severe younger sibling. It is one of the grossest things I have ever read in my entire life, and I haven't even gotten to someone with Ebola yet.

If you're squeemish, stop reading NOW! Trust me. I'll let you know when you can come back.

This book describes a person on a plane with bruises all over his face. He then began to throw up "black vomit", which is basically blood with black flecks in it. It says he looked like he ate coffee grounds. The author describes the man's red, bulging eyes. It even describes the bag which the man threw up in! 

Then, when the man gets to the hospital, the author describes how a doctor performs surgery on the man. It says the man's organs are liquefied, like the man was a living corpse. The really gross part is that the man throws up in the doctor's mouth. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

You can come back now. I'm done.

Thank you, biology teacher, for forcing me to read such a fascinating book. I thoroughly enjoyed my late-night sessions of almost throwing up in the bathroom while trying to read this book. However, now I am paranoid of everything and everyone, which explains the hazmat suit I'm wearing and the 30 page essay I wrote to the principal on why hazmat suits should be our school's uniform. Thanks to you, no one can touch me without me running away screaming "EBOLA! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!". I really appreciated this "enlightening" summer assignment. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go live the rest of my life in isolation. 

Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating a tiny bit. But only a tiny bit.

Random funny story: Last year, my history teacher made us create a political cartoon. So I drew a picture of President Obama, declaring Ebola is nothing to fear. In front of a Ebola quarantine area. While wearing a hazmat suit. YUP NOTHING TO FEAR!

From my corner to yours, 

Jennifer Whyskers

P.S. I already started writing my letter to the principal on our uniforms. Hazmat suits should be mandatory.